a meeting with God.

Posted: June 4, 2011 in Uncategorized
He's sitting there with his hands folded between his
comfortably spread knees.  A white button t-shirt and
blue jeans shroud his ample, muscular frame.  His head
is down and it is evident that He's been crying.

I sort of stumble through the door, like Abigail getting
pushed by Meangoat.

He looks up and towards me.  His face is somber...
knowing...
but there is no trace of a smile.  It's full of hurt.
I couldn't tell you what his face looks like, but i can
tell you the expressions...  they are etched into my 
memory.

I turn feeling sheepish.  I know I look terrible.  I feel so
disrespectful, coming to meet him in such filthy, humiliating
garments.  But like a student facing a teacher who knows
that she has cheated on a test, I drew myself together and turned.  I took a wooden step towards him.
  With longing and sorrow filling my voice, I uttered, "Hi"

His position hadn't changed.  His hands remained folded, as he looked straight into my eyes.
I realized that His pain was very much my pain... only moreso.

"Hi." he said.  His tone was thick with emotion.  Love was clearly evident.  Also solemnity.
This wasn't going to be easy for either of us.

"I guess we should probably talk eh?"

He smiled as he pulled his eyes away from me and looked down at his folded hands.
"I think so" He responded, and as if he had said it outloud, I know he had told
me that was just what He had been waiting to do.

"I'm so sorry I waited so long.  I just didn't know what to say, how to feel... if i could even
handle talking to you... I..."

He unclasped his hands then, leaned back and draped his arm over the bench.  He held his hand up to
stop me.

I didn't feel dismissed.  I felt accepted.  His gesture was telling me it was okay... He understood.

"You're here now." He kindly interrupted, "Come.  Lets talk"

At this point, for the first time, I felt like I could approach Him. . .  Like I had to acknowledge that
I had been hiding, so that He could assure me i didn't have to... so that our conversation could be honest.

I slid in beside Him, and His arm wrapped around me, and immediately, I wept.  

And that's how the conversation started.

He said, "I know."
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