fictional family

Posted: September 18, 2010 in Uncategorized

the thing is….
while you’re not real, you’re very real.

I love how you love each other! I think it serves to underscore my perspective that if you truly, deeply, passionately love your spouse, this will, in and of itself, go a LONG way in fostering emotional health and maturity in your children.

But if you don’t have that opportunity, if your spousal relationship is more challenging, i don’t think you’re “doomed”. frankly, I think that what it is about that spousal love that fosters emotional health and maturity is just this : having deep, unconditional, Christ-like love modeled in the home.
And I have seen parents model this for their children in their LOVE for their children, even without a spouse. The things is…
Love counts for a lot.

I’m not going to start singing “All You Need is Love” (although that is in my head)

because you do need more than that. in your fictional family, you had a delightful rapport with your adopted son, you daughter, and your each other. you loved each other immensely, every one of you. but there came a moment when what your daughter needed from you was for you to push a little harder. She didn’t need you to punish her or stop her in her tracks. She needed you be an ear…. But she needed you to draw her words out of her.

She needed you to do some of the hard work.

So love is NOT all you need. But it sure creates a solid foundation.

Thank you for the reminder that love creates true safety, and safety enables emotional health and maturity.

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